The Demonization of sex & protecting children

The people who are most afraid of children being exposed to sexuality are the very people who inflict it on children – through molestation (physical or mental – i.e. ‘you’ll go to hell if you do that!”) We forget that children have their own brand of sexuality – like discovering they have body parts that feel good sometimes. The trick is – not to make them feel bad about it – whilst keeping it relatively private.

The problem is that adults have to include themselves in it – leave the children alone! – meaning don’t discourage sexuality, but at the same time – teach them that there’s a time & a place for it. (Us adults could learn from that!) It’s when we have to ‘include’ ourselves – via child pornography & molestation – or the other end of the spectrum – demonizing sexuality – that we warp their fragile little minds!

Just because we have such a variety of sexual hang-ups, doesn’t mean that we can impose them on our children. (And because of them – imposing our hang-ups on other adults!) We are all responsible for keeping our children safe – but not to the detriment of their psychological well-being or the well-being of consenting, mature adults.

There is a time & place for everything – let’s not continue the backslide into the Dark Ages! No more witch hunts & burning at the stake. Either grow up & recognize that we are in the 21st Century – or climb back under the rock you came from.

Advertisements

Is porno the other lover?

What makes porno such a dirty word – especially in relationships? When the woman comes home & sees her partner jacking off to porn – why does she get so mad? On the one hand, you could argue that at least he (or she) isn’t off screwing someone else – but is it a form of cheating? That depends. If they won’t screw you but are happy to look at porn – there should be warning bells.

What if it just happened that they were horny & you weren’t available? These things need to be discussed before you threaten to leave. Men aren’t the only ones who enjoy porn – but society seems to view a women enjoying porn as a nympho. It would be so much easier if both men & women agreed porn has it’s place – & that if we’re going to use porn – then at least agree to share it with each other rather than hoarding it for ourselves!

If we can’t admit to each other what turns us on – then what’s the point of being together? Guilt, perversity & resentment have a lot to do with it. It also irks me that men are so allowed to be scornful when ‘confronted’ with gay male porno – but they can shout it from the rooftops when they see lesbian porn. I believe women are more open for a number of reasons – first – they can appreciate sexuality in whatever form it takes (to a degree, of course!)

Secondly – we are force fed the female form & directed to worship it – in the most idealized format – and to aspire to that same form – which is unattainable for most of us, seeing as we don’t have airbrush artists, personal trainers, etc. Thirdly – women are more likely to be oppressed sexually (which seems strange in today’s world – where we see scantily clad ‘slutty’ women everywhere!) Women can enjoy sex – as long as it’s in the terms that are issued to us by our male dominated society.

Some women think in terms of “If you can’t beat them – join them – or tear them down!”  Women can be their own worst enemies – joining the ranks of the dictatorial male dominated media & establishment – setting the sexual pace for women & impossible standards just to set women up to fail. Men enjoy this – because it keeps women busy & off their backs! Never be afraid to say you’re a feminist – with masculinist undertones! Or better yet – a Humanist!

We can all enjoy sex without fear of recrimination – just don’t use it to subjugate others or to replace the simple things like love, affection etc. And another thing – to all you right wing religious fanatics – yes – families are important – children should be protected – and it’s up to you – not the rest of us! We are adults & we will continue thinking what we want & viewing what we want (within reason!) The only reason you zealots are afraid of pornography is that it reminds you that you don’t ‘get it’ or – get it how you’d want. Jealousy is all the fun you think someone else is having!