Kaleidescope

esleadlight

Sweet, self-induced coma, brought on by dope that earns its’ keep.

Brain sloshing around the skull, collecting shells from the sodden shore, I absent-mindedly staggered back to the security of the elephant footpath, as grey as death, the sky a pregnant sponge.

The other bodies trundle past, not seeing me. But I see them; their spirits.

The completely vulgar couple, walking entwined.

Guffawing donkey lady with sprays of orange hair leaping away from the cranium.

Dusty, cobwebby old man, shuffling and murmuring.

Gaunt, starving junkie, zigzagging and blathering.

Middle-aged beetroot, pickled with alcohol.

Rotten bacon bikie, eyes and jaw locked, strutting unconvincingly.

Witch wannabe, furiously flapping purple sleeves, slitty conniving eyes.

Bulldozing business lady, sure-footed and pretentiously crisp.

Too tired to notice more, so I turned to the library, diving for security.

The librarian, crusty with knowledge, peered suspiciously at me, but I didn’t

care, and flopped down on the chair.

Putty faces everywhere, so I submerse myself into useless information.

St Paul eradicating women from the church – “Let your women keep silence

in the churches, for it is not permitted unto them to speak.” Stupid prick.

Lost Aztec history, self-help manuals, psychology magazines, spy novels.

Boredom.

Back home to nothingness.

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Is porno the other lover?

What makes porno such a dirty word – especially in relationships? When the woman comes home & sees her partner jacking off to porn – why does she get so mad? On the one hand, you could argue that at least he (or she) isn’t off screwing someone else – but is it a form of cheating? That depends. If they won’t screw you but are happy to look at porn – there should be warning bells.

What if it just happened that they were horny & you weren’t available? These things need to be discussed before you threaten to leave. Men aren’t the only ones who enjoy porn – but society seems to view a women enjoying porn as a nympho. It would be so much easier if both men & women agreed porn has it’s place – & that if we’re going to use porn – then at least agree to share it with each other rather than hoarding it for ourselves!

If we can’t admit to each other what turns us on – then what’s the point of being together? Guilt, perversity & resentment have a lot to do with it. It also irks me that men are so allowed to be scornful when ‘confronted’ with gay male porno – but they can shout it from the rooftops when they see lesbian porn. I believe women are more open for a number of reasons – first – they can appreciate sexuality in whatever form it takes (to a degree, of course!)

Secondly – we are force fed the female form & directed to worship it – in the most idealized format – and to aspire to that same form – which is unattainable for most of us, seeing as we don’t have airbrush artists, personal trainers, etc. Thirdly – women are more likely to be oppressed sexually (which seems strange in today’s world – where we see scantily clad ‘slutty’ women everywhere!) Women can enjoy sex – as long as it’s in the terms that are issued to us by our male dominated society.

Some women think in terms of “If you can’t beat them – join them – or tear them down!”  Women can be their own worst enemies – joining the ranks of the dictatorial male dominated media & establishment – setting the sexual pace for women & impossible standards just to set women up to fail. Men enjoy this – because it keeps women busy & off their backs! Never be afraid to say you’re a feminist – with masculinist undertones! Or better yet – a Humanist!

We can all enjoy sex without fear of recrimination – just don’t use it to subjugate others or to replace the simple things like love, affection etc. And another thing – to all you right wing religious fanatics – yes – families are important – children should be protected – and it’s up to you – not the rest of us! We are adults & we will continue thinking what we want & viewing what we want (within reason!) The only reason you zealots are afraid of pornography is that it reminds you that you don’t ‘get it’ or – get it how you’d want. Jealousy is all the fun you think someone else is having!